I ran across some link to a story about Julia Child, I think it was a link to a recipe of her's, and there was a video about the woman who did the blog that became the book that became the movie that I didn't see. But the clip had a lot of footage of Julia from "The French Chef." I love food. I love cooking. I read the Julia Child book (can't remember the title, of course) and loved it and as soon as I have a spare hundred bucks I'm going to buy Mastering the Art of French Cuisine. Until then, I'll grab what I can off the internet.
Anyway, I'm watching this video, and Samantha comes in, and she starts asking about who Julia Child was. I tell her she was the first real celebrity chef, before that was even a term, and how she had a tremendous influence on the way we cook food today. "Is she still alive?" Sam asked. No she passed away, but she led a very full life. Pause. "Did somebody shoot her or did she just die?"
Okay, at first, I really wanted to laugh at that one, but I didn't. The idea of someone wanting to shoot Julia Child, well, it's going to make a hilarious short for you tube. Somebody get on that. So I do my best to explain the concept of 'natural causes' and how after a certain point, when someone is very old, they die. And as I'm explaining this to her, I wonder to myself, 'did somebody shoot her? that's her first guess on how she died? what the hell is this kid watching? or hearing about?'
Yes, I let her watch TV, but I don't remember any episodes of "Phineas and Ferb" where Dr. Doofenshmirtz is busting caps in people all over Danville. And I'm pretty sure these isn't a My Little Pony called 'Homicidal Molly' or Pistol Packin' Priscilla.
Of course, the enlightened parent would have calmly said, "that's interesting that you know someone can die from being shot. How did you come to possess this tidbit of knowledge?" But I can't stop thinking, "where the fuck did you pick that up?" shows you were I am and on the enlightened parent continuum. I'm higher than Joan Crawford but lower than Dr. Phil.
We watch "Cupcake Wars." For those of you that haven't seen it, there is no actual warfare or gunplay. We watch "This Old House" (coincidentally produced by Russ Morash, who produced The French Chef). Then it hits me.
Rango.
We saw Rango. Twice in the theaters. We own the DVD. I own the soundtrack. (did it win for best animated movie, i'm out of the loop on that stuff). And I thought it was wonderful. the animation was superb, outdoing Pixar. Great story, well written, Johnny Depp, brilliant. I sometimes sing the theme song to Sam when we're rushing to school. But it does take place in the Old West, if it was populated by vermin. And there is shooting. There is a lot of shooting. And people get shot and die in the movie. (I can only remember one, and it was a bird, but you get the idea).
Now, according to the wife, this is the age (six) when girls start to get obsessed with death. Pretending that mommy or daddy has died, funerals for the dolls, that kind of thing. I haven't witnessed that yet in Samantha, but I guess we're starting down that road.
I feel bad. Yes, I know I didn't sit her down and watch the extended cut of Peckinpaw's "The Long Riders" but I also didn't watch the movie first to make sure it was okay (something a more evolved parent would do. Her friends father does that. But how the fuck does he have time to go to the movies by himself? And IF i had that kind of time, I would pick something I wanted. AND I feel like I can't bring it up with her again because too much time has passed. I'm sure the damage was limited, and hopefully this won't stop her from becoming the first female president of the united states. A fifth grade teacher in our school is convinced this is her destiny. I just want to be able to use her college money for a bass boat, but that's getting off topic. And we're supposed to go see The Lorax on Friday. Any advance word on what that contains? Violence? Nudity? A viable third political party? I'll have to roll the dice and hope I don't screw her up more than I already have. I'll forward this post to her future therapist.
Well maybe she'll end up being VICE instead of President.
ReplyDeleteIt will all be brought up during the campaign about how her dad ruined her. :/
lol
has she seen Bambi? :-)
ReplyDeleteYou are out of your mind.
But the good news is that her friends father is way more insane than you are.
Stop worrying so much....Sam is fine.
I never should have left you....
Let me preface this by saying that I don't have children, so I have absolutely no authority to speak on this topic whatsoever. That said, I probably would have reacted the same way you did and then followed it up by forbidding her from seeing any of her, obviously delinquent, friends. Ever.
ReplyDeleteThen I remembered that I used to watch the Late Movie with my Dad when I was a wee tot. I would make him promise to wake me up so we could sit together and watch westerns. Lots of bad guys and shooting. I think I came out okay, except for that persistent tic, so perhaps Durango won't scar her for life.
Incidentally, if you've ever heard Julia Childs speak, you could be forgiven for wondering how she ever avoided a bullet.